For bad days

Every one has bad days. Its just natural, but sometimes those bad days can get well bad. So heres some tips for when you are having a bad day!

1: Call or text a friend. When you're feeling low you have to remind yourself that you are surrounded by people that love you, but sometimes its hard to remember that. So reach out. Talk to a friend or a family member and let them know how you're feeling. Sometimes just talking about it can help even if you don't go into detail about your problems, just saying i'm not okay is a great step in the right direction!

2: Create a relaxing environment. When i'm having a bad day I want nothing more then to curl up in bed and hide from the world. But that doesn't always help, so rather then hiding away try to create a cosy environment which makes you feel cosy and safe. Heres how i achieve a cosy environment first I put on some candles, fairy lights or a nice ambient lamp, get some hot chocolate or what ever warm drink you prefer (I recommend staying away from caffeine though), get in your Pj's and grab a nice blanket and hot water bottle. Get on the sofa, with the thickest fluffy socks you can find and stick on a film (My personal favourite is Harry Potter and the Philosophers stone I find that it really relaxes me) and just relax for a while. After that I try to have either a bubble bath or a nice hot shower, then I try to create the same atmosphere in my bedroom and grab a nice book (My go to relax / calm me down book is currently 'All that she can see' by Carrie Hope Fletcher) and just breathe. One trick i usually do at this point is put on gentle rain sounds in the background, I've found that the rain sounds mixed with cosy blankets, fairy lights and a good book is my perfect relaxation environment. Or if you find something else relaxing try that instead!

3: Try to go outside. I've found that when I have bad days its usually because i've either been around too many people for too long or i've been inside and alone for too long. On the days where the former is true I go home and follow steps 2 and 4, but on the days where the latter is true I use a mixture of steps 3, 5 and 6. When I feel that I have been inside for too long or i'm feeling particularly lonely, i've found that just taking a moment outside can really help. If its a really bad day then don't put too much pressure on yourself but do try to spend a couple of minuets outside, even if you're just stood at your backdoor starring at the sky for a minuet, it's better then nothing! But if you feel that you can manage it, put some boots or walking shoes on, if its cold outside a thick coat and maybe gloves and a scarf, put your headphones in with your favourite chill out music and go for a walk. My favourite place to go is in the woods, i've found that just wandering through trees with soft music on really helps to clear my head. Whilst outside try to take some deep breaths to help keep you calm and relaxed.

4: Turn off your phone. On the days where i've just been around too many people for too long I find that I need to just have time for myself or my bad day is just going to get worse and worse. So what I like to do is turn off my phone for a little while, I tend to make sure that I tell at least a few people that i'm going to be doing this so that at least someone is aware that they wont be able to contact me for a little while. When you're having a bad day there is nothing worse for you then social media. Im not necessarily talking about talking to other people such as Facebooks messaging app, I mean more like apps that have newsfeeds such as twitter. I've found that my twitter, snapchat stories and facebook timeline can sometimes have very overwhelming content as its often full of people either bragging about something or people moaning about something and so i've found that a key aspect of making a bad day better is turning my phone off, even if its for an hour or two. Taking a break from your phone can really help.

5: Find a distraction. On days when everything gets just a bit too much it can become quite easy to get lost in that emotion, or spend the day wallowing in self pity, and whilst that is okay in moderation as it allows you to process everything, it can quickly become a problem. So for the times that it does get a bit too much its good to find a distraction or something that can occupy you for at least a little while. It doesn't have to be anything big, you don't even have to move, it just has to keep you busy. Here are some examples of safe/good distractions: knitting, cooking, baking, doing your make up, going for a run, reading a book, writing a story, drawing, playing a video game, creating a blog, finding a new tv show to watch.

6: Write it down. Sometimes when you're having a bad day, you just need to let it out, a good way to do that is to write it down. This can be in the form of a diary, a letter or just a note you can write it down in any way you like, you could even make a full essay out of it if you wanted to. But the aim is to write down everything you are thinking, feeling or going through. This is a good way for you to blow off some steam or let out thoughts you wouldn't want to share with anyone else, or if you struggle to talk about your feelings or what you're going through then this is a good way for you to write it all down and then give that to someone else so that they can read about everything you're going through without you having to say a single word. If you struggle with writing things down you could always try to record yourself speaking audio book style or creating a vlog like video just so that you can express everything and let everything out in a safe way.

7: Remind yourself. This to me is the most important step. Remind yourself that you are Loved. Remind yourself that you ARE worthy. Remind yourself that you are allowed to not be okay. Remind yourself that you are NOT a burden. Remind yourself to eat, even if its just for someone else's sake. Remind yourself to drink some water. Remind yourself that you are important to somebody.

On bad days there is nothing more important then remembering to take care of yourself in the best way for you. If that is taking a day off work or school then do that. If that is going for a run then do that. If that is crying in the bathtub until you feel better then do that (in moderation don't cry for too long, maybe say that when you're fingers start to shrivel in the water you will get up and focus on happier thoughts). If that is writing it all down then do that. As long as it is a safe and is going to have an actual impact on your mood then do what ever it takes. Because at the end of the day, you deserve nothing less then happiness, you are so so important and amazing and brilliant, you are so loved and you deserve to have a better tomorrow.

Love Tia 🌸